Gratitude

Yes, I know. More positive! Gratitude! Joy! Fun! Smile!

I am indeed grateful for a loving care-giver for my son during the day. She is amazing and is willing to wear him on her back for his limited daytime naps. We appreciate that very much. My work schedule is just ramping up, and my Fridays (which used to be quiet home days with naps together, etc) are now spent at work/daycare with the associated heartache of that. And it doesn't help ME to think that he's happier with her, although I should be grateful that he's happy there, etc. I'm OK with him there a couple days a week, but now that I'm working toward full-time schedule (not my choice, only necessary for this job, which I need to keep for financial reasons) it causes me more stress. Need to be grateful for what we have. Am grateful. Mostly.

So, I tend to get a bit dramatic on Fridays. I suppose we'll get more used to it soon enough.

And I really have been reading some good stuff lately about the law of attraction and other positive thinking things. Trying hard to think about things we DO want rather than stuff we don't. Carry on...

Working Mom Whines

Vignettes from a reluctant working Mom’s life:

See Baby coming home smelling like another woman, the new daycare assistant whom we haven’t even met. Feel very viscerally wrong to have baby smell like a stranger.

See Baby falling asleep on the drive home AND on the drive in to town because he’s not really napping at daycare. Awake hours with baby in evening yesterday: 1. Total for day: maybe 3 (including drive to town and morning “get ready” time).

See Mom stressing about lowered mom-milk production, leading to more “quality” time with the pump at work and desperate middle-of-the-night “extra” pumping sessions. Ouch.

See house disintegrate into chaos due to lack of organization and being home for approximately 1.5 awake hours on most working days. Too messy for guests, cats or even smooth daily living. Ug.

See Mom’s mood deteriorate due to not having time to exercise (exacerbated due to snow, cold and darkness). See Mom argue with husband about a variety of things due to darkened mood.

See Mom eat cookies and drink coffee in desperate attempt to stay awake and get something done… see mood deterioration, above.

See Mom stress about inability to use timesaving crockpot, vaccum cleaner, washing machine, chest freezer, dishwasher, dryer, microwave etc either because of the lack of solar energy to run them or the lack of said appliance due to moral/frugality ideals. Cursed ideals!

See Mom sitting alone in cubicle, trying to motivate self to do random silent office work, feeling ever-increasingly guilty about goals not met. See Mom trying to tell herself she is lucky to have job, etc. See Mom remain unconvinced.

THE WORST ONE: (that lead me to post this when I held back yesterday, thinking it too whiney): See Baby exhibit separation anxiety FOR the daycare provider (ie cry/reach for her this morning, over Mom.) Ouch.


See Mom try desperately to rise above situation and motivate some sort of big family/professional change; sell house? Move to town? Stage big fit? Freelance? Beg for money? Hmmm. Any advice or inspiration out there? Stay tuned!

Cousin Catch-Up

We're a little swamped with regular life lately, but there's been some good grandparent and cousin visiting lately. And teeth!



More Kazoo for Yoo...



A cousin! 2 grandkids! Yay!

Baby Cousin Bean

The new cousin is here (the daughter of my brother and his wife)! A couple weeks early, a nice suprise for everyone!

She arrived on Friday and is apparently already almost back to her original birth weight. Everything went smoothly and quickly!

We visited with Bean the first night, but they both missed their first meeting... snoozing together. He's been taking naps after daycare; too much going on to sleep there, I guess.



Congrats, A and R... and welcome to baby A! We need to find a good blog name... we'll keep you posted!

Baby Safe

We're feeling better now, able to get some projects done! This one required skilled hired help, but still, it's something important off our list, completed.

Our house is wierd. It was built in the 80's by a family who was living in the basement as they built it, as far as we know, and I've always suspected it was designed by someone who didn't usually design houses (sketched on a napkin, perhaps?).

This little piece of oddity had never really bothered me before, until I thought of it in terms of a toddler...


There is 8-foot drop into the entry way from the dining room... divided by a wall that comes up just past my knee. Eeeek. You can see the top of the front door in this picture.


We usually had many plants on the "wall", so it was less noticable. Perhaps it's nice to have all that light, but yikes, what were the builders thinking? Luckily, it occured to me that it definitely wasn't baby-safe before Bean had a chance to show us that himself; he's still not very mobile.



So, this is what we now have! WF was worried it would look a bit like a prison, but it's definitely safer. I think it looks fine...We'll have to relocate plants, etc, but here's to a more kid-safe house!

Topsy turvy temps

There’s something wrong with this picture;

My (usually accurate) car thermometer read -26 F at the lowest point on the way to work this morning. And now my personal thermometer reads 100.8. Hmmm… thought I had kicked this bug yesterday!

So, where do I apply to have those numbers rearranged a bit? Guess I should go home and try to sleep….

Snowy, Germy New Year!

Well, it's 2009, but we haven't ventured into the world enough to notice, really. We've missed so many social visits due to snow and sickness this winter... various combinations of snot and fever and pinkeye and gut bugs; blah! I even missed work today (a special event) while pushes ALL my guilt buttons. Ah, well, it was better to stay home with my fever and recover.. feeling better now. We're lucky nothing has been super serious.

Yesterday was good for Bean and I, though. Pictures were taken. 8 months old!